Are you available?

Posted on May 20, 2013 by

michaelI am available to more good than I have ever imagined, realized, experienced or thought possible…

Thanks to this lovely soul on the left, Michael Bernard Beckwith, this has been my morning mantra for the past few months.  And, I’ll admit it: I’m a little obsessed with his “Life Visioning Process,” which I’ve listened to three times through in my car while driving around town. (If you see me circling, that’s what’s going on.)

I’ve followed Beckwith’s play-work (his term) for years because I think he’s one of the most highly conscious individuals I’ve ever heard speak. I also feel connected to him because he started his spiritual center right down the street from where I used to live in Culver City. I often think about that. While I was lamenting with my 3 single mom friends about how to deal with challenging ex-husbands and best raise our children–mind you, over Chardonnay, cigarettes, and hot dogs (confessions of the dark days of a health coach)–Beckwith was visioning Agape as this:

When I founded the Agape International Spiritual Center and community in 1986, we “visioned” it as a movement that would take a stand for love, for peace, for being a beneficial presence on the planet. That’s why it was named “Agape,” which in Greek means unconditional love.

Aside from your views on spiritual centers, his accomplishment is impressive. He started with 9 people in his living room and $17. Agape now has something like 9,000 local members and 1,000,000 friends around the world. I don’t know about you, but I find that extremely telling. Within the walls of Agape, all major decisions go through the life visioning process.

I’ve written before about vision boards, visualization, life writes–all various tools to be a co-creator of your own life. What I like about Beckwith’s approach in this work is that he breaks down the process to four stages and asks you to look at where you are in those, and look in the direction of your own evolution. You can pick any area of your life and throw it into the stages. Let’s use the “getting your body healthy” area to see how this is done.

Stage 1 – The Victim: This is the stage where something is being done to you in your mind–by something outside yourself. In health, it might sound like this: “My mother raised me with all kinds of poor eating habits and gave me lame genetics to boot. I’d eat better, but my friends want to go to happy hour on the weekends, and I can’t just be a party pooper. Then, my husband brings home cupcakes and I can’t resist them. I have no time to exercise…” and so on.

Stage 2 – The Manifester: At this stage, you realize you are doing something to it. You say, “Hey. I am a co-creator in my reality. I have a say, and what I say creates my reality. Even though I learned certain habits, I have the choice now to relearn. I might need new friends that have similar goals as I do–or, I’m going to see if my friends are open to walking the track instead of slamming down Mojitos. I’m going to ask my husband to hide/not buy/be respectful of bringing tempting foods in…and I’m going to remember, there’s always someone busier than me out there who is making time for exercise.”

Stage 3 – In The Zone: Here, things happen through you. Have you ever felt like you were doing something, but really, there was something much greater than you working through you? For example, when I run on the treadmill (especially at hotels which is my favorite place to run on treadmills for some strange reason I don’t fully understand) about 15 minutes in, I’m in the zone. I’m listening to Kelly Clarkson and Keith Urban (sometimes over and over) or my exercise playlist, my legs are moving, my breath is going in and out, sweat is dripping off, but I’m no longer doing the work.

This also happens when I write. At some point, my fingers are banging away, but something far greater than me is downloading content. Artists, writers, athletes–they all talk about this place. In your health journey, this would be when your healthy habits are flowing, and you’re working your blueprint to a healthier you, mentally, physically, spiritually. And it just feels natural.

Stage 4 – You are the Zone: I reworded steps 3 & 4, but this is the concept. He makes the distinction between separation of “being in” and just being, a crucial distinction. In this stage, you are one with the world, metaphysically speaking. In your health journey, it’s not about “cheating” or “diets” or any of that. It’s about the place where you live. You respect your body, you treat it accordingly. Beckwith uses the phrase “body temple.” For me, this translates into priority. The choices I make, the habits I build, the way I spend my time and who I spend my time with–they all have to do with making me healthier on all levels. They are  ”bliss-ciplines,” another coined Beckwith-ian phrase I love.

These stages are not linear. You may find yourself in different stages in different areas. In any given area, you can flip from 4, to 1, to 3. And, if you’re in Stage 4, it’s not like your work is done. This is just a blueprint to co-create your life, to evolve–to use your experiences to serve your world.

In the life visioning process, you see where you are going. You set a high intent, followed by a strength-based plan, and you give abundant gratitude knowing that all is underway and accomplished.

What would we choose to do if we believed anything was possible? How much could we do for ourselves, our communities–our world–if we spent less time in pity parties (like my Culver City mommy’s gripe club) and more time trying to figure out our unique purpose and mission–then set out a plan to make ourselves available?

I am available to more good than I have ever imagined, realized, experienced or thought possible…

Yeah, I am.

Posted in health, healthy living, Inspiration | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Secrets Skinny People Know

Posted on May 13, 2013 by

fbhealth2jpgI know these secrets because I’ve long studied them. My husband and I have been friends for 31 years, dated for 20, and been married for 16. He has a thin brain. My youngest son is 14. He’s the same way. My oldest son and I have fat brains, but we’re molding them into skinny brains. I’m not saying the work’s done, but we’ve made some serious progress.

Here are five secrets I’ve learned from my anthropological research on Thin Brainers (TBs). Read them. Learn them. Breathe them into your DNA.

Thin Brain Secret #1: They know how to graze like cows. This is key. It’s intuitive. They eat little amounts all day long. And they seem to know what their bodies want and need. Like their bodies call them up and say, “Hey–Dude–wanna shoot me down some mango?” Or when they are eating dessert, they only eat a few bites because that’s all their body wants and they say things like, “It’s too rich.” I marvel at my son’s intuitive ability to know what his body needs and so try not to over-edit with my idea of what’s good for him and bad for him. I recognize his ability is evolved beyond mine and I don’t want to ruin it (not like we don’t pass down our weird food things or anything–ahem.)

Thin Brain Secret #2: In all things, moderation. Ugh. If I had a nickel for each time I have to hear my husband say this.  I don’t excel at moderation. I’ve had to learn it. But TBs just live this way. Theirs are the plates at Thanksgiving that you can still see the plate shining up between the various foods. Imagine that. Have a piece of pie, don’t eat the whole pie. Don’t eat another one tomorrow. And the next day. There is no “cheating” in their world. There is no “diet.” You’ll never hear these words coming out of the TB’s mouth. It’s just how they live.

Thin Brain Secret #3: They don’t get overly excited by food. I remember dating a guy in Hermosa Beach named Wayne, a definite TB. One night he took me to the Cheesecake Factory in Redondo Beach. I ordered a pesto pasta dish with pine nuts (bonus secret: TBs never remember what they ordered) and when it came my eyes lit up in a way that made him say, “I’ve never seen somebody so excited about their food.” (His friends were obviously TBs, too!) Food is fuel. They eat to live–not vice versa.

Thin Brain Secret #4: They don’t post pictures of food on Facebook! Because they don’t get too excited about food (as if it were a newborn baby), you won’t see them taking pictures of their food and posting it on Facebook with comments surrounding it. Hardly ever. I can’t prove this one for sure, but I have a serious intuitive hunch based on my informal, longitudinal study. (Not gonna lie. String down my FB page for proof that I have not yet reached the Sensei stage of TB.)

Thin Brain Secret #5: TBs don’t associate every city and destination with restaurants. They go where they go. It’s more about food and price than “the event.” When I hit the 405 interchange in LA, I automatically start thinking about 4 star restaurants I love there. My husband thinks about traffic. Not food. Traffic. Adding on to this, they don’t give directions by food establishments: “you turn at the Sizzler and then drive down to Bucca di Beppo (have you tried their chicken parm?) and turn left…then drive past that vegetarian place with the best desserts….” You get the point.

Bonus Bonus Thin Brain Secret: They forget to eat. My husband has said to me many times that he was hungry and then got involved in something and forgot to eat. Forgot to eat? Are you kidding me? I can count on one hand the number of times this has happened to me. So I tried to forget to eat…and guess what? I DID IT! What my husband told me was that the hunger sensation will pass. It’s not forever. I didn’t know that because I made sure I was never hungry–like I had a fear of being hungry. Maybe if I was hungry I’d die or something. I’m not saying it’s rational. Let me reassure you, it passes, and I’m still alive to tell you it’s okay and doesn’t demand a double double with cheese.

Here’s what I say: study the thin brains in your life. They came into this world knowing a thing or two (thanks to their hard wiring–I’m sure of it) that Fat Brainers don’t. We are to learn from them, to study them, to copy their habits. We are to graze like cows, eat in moderation, don’t freak out and overeat if we get hungry, and be mindful of tieing emotions so tightly around chocolate chip cookies that they become one in the same.

Here’s what I know: we may not have been given TBs, but we can earn them. We must be mindful and as a wise client said recently, “We can’t turn our backs on ourselves for a second.”

Posted in coaching, Goals, health, healthy living | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Can You Want Them Into It?

Posted on May 6, 2013 by

DSCN5656When I began losing weight quickly, and people asked me what I was doing, I decided I’d become a health coach and bring them along for the ride. Mind you, I was very much in process myself, but I figured, “Hey–share the wealth!” I truly believed I had uncovered the secret (still do!) I had been searching for and got very excited about letting other people in on the story.

This started happening everywhere I went, probably because the weight was  dropping off so quickly. Each time I went to make a deposit at the bank, the bank people would ask, “What the heck are you doing?” until one day, they sequestered me in a room and made me tell my secret.

The next thing I knew, I had an unsuspecting mother in my livingroom. A well-intentioned daughter was worried about her mom and knew she wouldn’t be receptive to a health coach or a plan, so just told her mother they were going for a drive. Then she dropped her at my house intervention-style.

As you might imagine, that didn’t work. Oh, she did become my client temporarily, but she had not gotten to the same point of frustration with her fat suit that her daughter had.

You have someone you love and you know their weight carries a high price.  You know the extra weight will cost them soon enough. In meds, in quality of life, in confidence, in life span. What do you do?

You must step cautiously. The best idea is to model for your loved one and be quiet (in the case of kids.) In the case of other adults, you can share information (this blog for example), but don’t make all your conversations/insinuations come back to that topic. Overweight people develop this sixth sense and are highly sensitive to weight commentary, verbal or otherwise. I know because I was there.

With my rapid weight loss on Take Shape for Life, my oldest son came to me and asked me if I’d be his health coach. He had seen me do all kinds of programs and had never shown interest for more than a few weeks. TSFL was different. I think he liked the structure–there were no meetings and he knew exactly what to do and when to do it. Thriving in this framework, he went from 340 to 170, half his size. It wasn’t because I bugged him–it was because he saw me doing it and he knew if I could do it he could do it. He felt empowered.

558602_650774935111_46002031_33198843_1976231456_n[1]It’s hard to watch people we love surround themselves with a fat barrier that could potentially kill them. It’s hard to know what to say or do. Your best strategy is to be your own best healthy self, set goals for yourself and achieve them (talk about that with them) and make sure they know you love them at any size.

And when they’re ready, help them find a health coach like me, somebody who has been down the road and can help them learn to run it! Just make sure you let them in on it.

Check out my story this month in Health Magazine, the “I Did It!” feature. This is my outfit–sans jacket–that New Balance gifted me. Thanks, New Balance. Also, click here to check out my story on anewscafe.com. (http://anewscafe.com/2013/05/01/conversation-with-jamie-weil-paying-it-forward-85-pounds-lighter/. Thank you, Doni!

DSCN0084

Posted in body image, coaching, conscious living, health, healthy living, Inspiration, restaurants, weight maintenance | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Meditation Medicine

Posted on April 29, 2013 by

399639_528990720451368_1907623331_nNow before you go and think I’ve gone all metaphysical on you (again), last Tuesday’s Wall Street Journal featured an article called “Doctor’s Orders: 20 Minutes of Meditation Twice a Day.” Not Om magazine, friends. The Wall Street Journal.

We’re talking western medical docs here. Not that I think doctors are the end all be all, because I think many of them are on a very wrong path in their attitudes to healing others. This isn’t their fault, entirely, as the healthcare system in our country is a train wreck. Many simply bought a ticket for treating sick care instead of health care.

I do recognize, however, that our culture still listens to doctors and holds what they say in high (sometimes, Biblical) regard. So here you have it, in the business newspaper straight from primary-care docs out of Boston’s prestigious Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center: Meditation is being prescribed the same way medicine is being prescribed.

“I recommend five minutes, twice a day, and the gradually increase,” said Aditi Nerurkar, a primary-care doctor.

Anybody who has meditated for any period of time knows why. Consistent meditation, starting slow and titrating up, can be therapeutic for living. Medicinal, even. The article goes on to say how meditation is recommended for anything from insomnia, depression, and anxiety to irritable bowel syndrome (and everything in between!) It works not instead of, but rather compliments, remedies already in place.

And it’s free! (No, you don’t have to wear a long robe. Or you can. Go naked. Get fancy. No dress code for meditation.)

Why, then, isn’t everybody doing it? I’m willing to bet if I surveyed 20 random people, I’d only hit about 5%. (That would increase in certain geographical regions–like mine–because it’s often looked upon as voodoo.)

It’s not voodoo. It’s a “pause that refreshes” my mother used to call it. It’s taking a moment in a go-and-don’t-stop world to breathe deeply, to clear the chatter, to discover what’s been trying to get your attention. To listen.

Let’s say you’re in. You want to do it. Where do you start?

There are many techniques. Guided meditations are fantastic for both beginners and veterans, especially when focus is challenging. I’ve recently fallen in love with Omvana (https://itunes.apple.com/us/app/omvana-meditate-relax-sleep/id595585396?mt=8), an app on my Iphone that offers both free and paid meditations. Their goal is to have everybody in the world meditating twice daily. The app allows you to mix background tracks with guided meditations on a number of topics, including weight loss, confidence, inner beauty, sleep, well-being, focus–the list goes on. This morning I listened to a man focusing on health to the background of a Native flute.

Of course, you don’t need an app. Just a quiet place and you breathing deeply then returning to the breath when you inevitably start thinking about what you are going to make for dinner. (I’ve said too much.)

I look at meditation just like exercise: 7 days a week is my goal. Not 3 hours, just 30 minutes total and I break that up. I do a guided meditation in the morning (always changing) and a quiet meditation in the shower, then usually one right before bed. I sleep like a baby when I do that and get very full dreams. If I miss, I notice a difference.

As meditation works its way into mainstream, it gives me hope. Hope that we will take more responsibility for our health proactively and less reactively. Then, who cares about the healthcare system? We’ll only need it once in a great while, if at all. And just think–we can use all that extra time spent complaining in meditation.

Posted in coaching, conscious living, health, meditation, mental health | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

So Long, Stress Snacking

Posted on April 22, 2013 by

DSCN2914Punchy, isn’t it? Oh those magazine people and their catchy phrasing.

This is the “I Did It!” feature in the May, 2013, Health magazine and, yeah, that’s moi. I talked to several editors during the creation of this piece and each told me they were inspired mostly by this monthly section of their magazine. Me, too.

DSCN2913

I’m excited and honored to be included (especially in the same issue as Jewel!) When I started on my journey towards my ideal weight, I’d tear pictures out of magazines of what I was striving for as a visual end goal. I’d hang them in my closet. I wouldn’t pick skinny model shots, but well-toned athletic bodies that looked healthy. That’s the way I saw myself in the world. I wanted to be healthy all over, not just a particular size or pound marker on the scale.

When Health called back in January and told me they would like me to be in the May issue, I was so honored to be the one on the page. I was also a little freaked out. January is REALLY close to the holidays and I had just come off 4 trips (read–pants feeling snugger than I wanted them.) When I found out I’d need to do a photo shoot in their clothes that only upped the ante. I decided to do what I tell my clients to do: talk to yourself like you’re your own best friend. Celebrate your success, don’t obsess on what you perceive might be your failure. Hey–maybe my story could inspire someone at the beginning of their journey and encourage them along the way. This would make my journey even more meaningful. I was all in.

It was very enlightening to watch the whole process of how an article is born in a national magazine. I’ve freelanced articles in the past, but once I submit and invoice it, I never see it again until it shows up in the stands. This was wholly different. I was interviewed quite extensively, we had fact checks, work out clothes to pick from Fed Exed to my door (I got to keep the ones they picked in this photo–thank you, New Balance), make-up and hair on photo shoot day with Urban Retreat esthetician Jen and local photographer, Katina Matheson (thank you, Jen and Katina). It was quite a process.

I couldn’t help seeing the similarities to the weight loss process itself. There are many parts involved and the jury is out on what really works. It’s been a bad year for obesity studies that way. Everybody has an answer and a promise. When you’re at your highest weight ever, you can’t take another failed promise. Sometimes it feels easier to not even try.

Been there.

But I got this gift called Take Shape for Life. It’s the way that worked for me and so many of my clients (over 60 and 2,700 pounds worth.)  I’m grateful for that. And I’m so thankful now that I have the confidence to stand up, pose for a national magazine (without hiding behind someone else in a picture) say, “I Did It!” and leave it at that.

Posted in body image, coaching, conscious living, Exercise, Goals, health, healthy living, weight maintenance | Tagged , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Fat Musings

Posted on April 15, 2013 by

fatphoto (31)This is me holding a pound of fat. Well, a fat replica actually. I’ve seen this visual before, but actually wrapping my phalanges around this bad boy made me ecstatic that I’m not carrying 85 of these fat clomps on my body anymore.

It also raises questions. For example, where did I hide all that fat? True, I owned a lot of black and flowy dresses–and several flowy black dresses–but still. I may not have been as clever as I thought. I think people had to notice.

Here’s the next question that hits me: how the heck did I carry it all around? When my children were young, just lugging around 20 pounds of baby made my back and knees hurt. But 85? Come to think of it, I think my back and knees did hurt, especially when I decided to try and exercise it off and took all those pounds for a jog. Good thinking. That could not have been easy on my joints. I’ve since learned that exercising it off is extremely difficult. In fact, you would have to burn 3,500 calories to burn one pound of fat. That’s a lot. Change really needs to begin with what’s going in your mouth–and in between your ears–with exercise as the back-up crew for maintenance.

Next question. By carrying all that extra fat, did I build muscle? I mean, when I go to Power and lift weights for an hour, I can see my biceps pop. Doesn’t it follow that just the act of carrying the fat builds muscle? All over my body?!

Welcome to my brain. I still don’t have an answer for that one.

And finally, you’ve heard that one pound of muscle weighs more than one pound of fat. How can that be? Isn’t one pound of anything and one pound of another thing still one pound? This last one warranted extra research so you probably know what I did next. I Googled it. Here’s the consensus. A pound equals a pound. The difference is muscle takes up less room. Check this out.

fat&muscleLooks like sushi, right? This explains why my shorts from last summer feel a little tighter this year around the thighs even though my weight is the same. Armed with this visual, and the idea that I like pink better than yellow in this diagram, I’m going to focus on getting that muscle in-house and finding another location (not on my body) for that fat.

One final thought. Next time somebody says, “I only lost a pound,” send them this. It really is an accomplishment.

Posted in coaching, diet, Exercise, Goals, health, healthy living, Inspiration, movement, weight maintenance | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Psycho-sizology

Posted on April 8, 2013 by

jeans3As I was shoving myself into my Size 6 jeans last week (and I do mean shoving) I was feeling rather smug that I could–if I held my gut in–button them. This got me wondering why. I mean, who really cares? Why do I care?

For one, I care because I haven’t worn Size 6 (note the cap) since…um…5th…wait–4th grade which is really, really long ago. While size is just a number, whether on a garment item, or on the scale, we can’t help but be influenced by it at times. It’s really quite ridic if you think about it. Is anybody really focused on what size pants I’m wearing? Furthermore, do I really want to be that girl that runs around telling everybody her pant’s size?

But here’s the thing. When you’ve had to shop in the “special stores” for an extended period of time where fashion lags far behind what hides the fat, you understand what I mean. When you’ve had that snotty Size 0 sales clerk look you up and down and say, “Oh, there’s nothing in here that will fit you” you get what I mean. And, if you had the nice man slam the door in your face at Size 22, but hold it nice and long with a smile at Size 6, you know what I mean. (That’s irritating, but it’s the way it is, like it or not.)

Like it or not, size matters. And it really sort of sucks that it does, because, quite frankly, I think it’s a strong genesis for eating disorders. There’s a fine line between ideal weight and that ten pounds below that makes you look gaunt paired on the inside with a misconstrued idea that lower numbers are the Holy Grail for the body temple. And, on the other side, the guilt and worry (and on the worse end of that extreme–vomiting) that accompanies the full refrigerator/pantry/drive through binge. Why? All for the numbers.

This concept hit home when I was forced to name my sizes for a shoot for Health Magazine (May issue). New Balance wanted to send some clothes. The editor I was working with asked what size in bottoms, tops, sport’s bra, and shoes. This got me thinking about how I shop. I can wear from S-L in all those categories, depending on the designer. What also struck me when the clothes came to my front door was the size tags. A medium in the US was an extra large in Asia. Ha! Sad and funny all at the same time.

The importance of the number/size grows as the obesity rate sky rockets. Have you seen the new pay what you weigh campaign put forth by airlines? There is a movement underway to charge customers their weight. Or the insurance companies? Your premium dollars will be connected to the number at the scale. We think it’s unfair, but the companies that are having to pay more because Americans weigh more are throwing up their hands and change lurks on the horizon.

Like it or not, the numbers matter. So for today I’m going to let myself have my moment of smug in my Size 6 jeans because for so long I couldn’t…and now I can.

Posted in body image, coaching, conscious living, health, healthy living, Inspiration, weight maintenance | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Weeding in the Rain

Posted on April 1, 2013 by

bunny earsFor years, my kids thought this was how they came home from the store. Missing parts were normal.

And for years, I thought every holiday had to have its coordinating candy (fill in your blank here) to be worth celebrating. That certain rituals needed to take place to make a holiday meaningful for the family.

But as time marches by, I rethink this concept. We come from a culture that loves rituals. Traditions have a place for sure, but I really like what comes out of letting that go at times. You know, riding the wave of the moment in Eckhart Tolle fashion. I always enjoy the nuggets I take away when I do that.

Easter seemed like the perfect opportunity. When I woke up to a gray and rainy day, I tried to listen to that quiet voice that gets drowned out by to do lists. I thought how happy the plants were outside with that shot of spring pouring from the sky. Because we aren’t past the last frost yet, I’ve been babying four tomato plants that spent the night inside. I took them out for a rain bath and walked by the Mexican Sage. A huge dandelion poked up out the middle. Normally, that plant is covered in bees at this time of year, but not today. I pulled the Dandelion and it slid out.

A moment of clarity: the weeds will come out so easily in the rain.

It’s a job I don’t covet, weeding. But this was different. It wasn’t on my list. The rain was cooling after my morning workout. I rode the moment, started weeding, and before I knew it, several hours had passed and my beds were pretty darn clean. Me, on the other hand–wet and covered in mud.

My son was sick in bed, my husband playing his game on the couch, and I was weeding in the rain. I was pretty sure ours was the only house celebrating the day in this way. This was a new kind of Easter. One where all body parts came attached to the bunny. One where I had tuned in with my ears and my heart and ended up a muddy mess, and one that left me fulfilled and happy which, quite frankly, is much more than the chocolate bunny ears used to do.

Posted in body image, conscious living, Exercise, Goals, health, healthy living, Inspiration | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

To Weigh or Not to Weigh…

Posted on March 25, 2013 by

DSCN2204…and what does that have to do with “thinking outside the box,” that sweet spot where the magic happens?

The scale’s a funny thing for many of my Take Shape for Life clients (and me!) I’ve noticed a trend lately of clients not wanting to weigh themselves for fear they will be disappointed at the scale, or worse–become obsessed with the scale weighing all day long.

This got me thinking:  why do people weigh or don’t weigh?

They do weigh:

  1. To monitor weight so it doesn’t get out of line with their ideal range.
  2. Because the scale has become the decider of whether they did “good” or “bad” for a particular time.
  3. Because they have struggled with weight much of their lives and know they can gain easily if they don’t watch.

They don’t weigh:

  1. Because if the number at the scale doesn’t match their expectations they’ll get discouraged and give up.
  2. Because they’ve always been thin (this is my husband and my youngest son) and it doesn’t even occur to them.
  3. They don’t want to face the reality of the number because they equate that to their personal value.

And then there’s the whole eating disorder spectrum which takes these points to the extreme, plus the points which I haven’t covered here which are numerous.

What to do, then? It’s important to monitor your weight if you are one who tends to yo-yo. (Hand raised!) You can easily lose touch if you don’t. I mean, I used to be able to put 10 pounds on in a weekend without trying. But you also don’t want to become obsessed and constantly think about the number at the scale, which is so obviously just a number and not the total value of who you are and what you are doing for your health.

My first suggestion is to get outside your box, and try something you haven’t done–just for a week. If it doesn’t work, try something else. Know that there isn’t just one way to do this and you have to know your own issues, but also be willing to try something different for just a few days.

Like this. I usually weigh naked each morning. (TMI!) But while I was on vacation for the last few weeks with my husband, there was no scale and I used other measures like the feel of my clothes, tuning into my body more, looking in a mirror more closely–things like that. I decided I would try just weighing Monday and Thursday for awhile and use other methods to monitor. Then, I might go to once a week. The point is try something different.Experiment. That’s how we learn, right?

Where do you weigh in on this? If you feel comfortable sharing, I’d love to know how often you weigh and whether or not weight is one of your challenges. (We learn lots from our naturally thin people, too!)

Posted in body image, conscious living, diet, health, healthy living, weight maintenance | Tagged , , , , , | 6 Comments

Wanna play?

Posted on March 18, 2013 by

photo (22)

Playing reigns as one of the most important ways we can spend time on this planet. It’s also one of those things that gets pushed aside with the old plastic containers that are missing lids and shoved in that cupboard that nobody can find things in–or worse yet, the trash. I could muster research to prove how important play is in our lives, in our relationships, in our own personal development and creativity, but down deep, I don’t think that’s necessary.

The action item, instead, is to figure out how you like to play. Do you like to play alone or with others? I’m an only child so learned to love my alone time. It’s probably one of the reasons I love to write. But I also LOVE to play with other people. Tangential play. Interactive play. All of it. It’s one of my core values. I often have friends tell me, “You know how to play better than anybody I know.” I consider that a high compliment, because in play, comes learning, creativity, and connection. There isn’t a right or wrong way. Just ask yourself how you like to play.

Then, where is your playground? A Pisces by sun and moon, mine is the water. Here’s a water cave at the Mauna Lani Spa in Hawaii where my husband and I recently had a Watzu massage, a form of Shiatsu in the water. It’s like a water dance, stretch, baby-in-the-womb kind of thing. Snorkeling (though preferably without a shark next time), swimming, floating in a lake,  and long shower baths–great play places. On my vision board this year I wrote, “Play like the dolphins 365 days a year.” They dive in the water and jump around just for fun. You can feel the joy emanate off  them. They don’t need anything other than water and each other to have a good time.

If you’ve forgotten how to play, watch a child explore an airport or a playground. They find wonder in the smallest details adults often miss. Watch a puppy, or an animal of any kind, after it wakes up and gets going. We watch our dog go through the process of figuring out what she will play next. (Walk is her favorite game!)

Kids and animals are both great teachers and you’ll learn from them. When I worked as a marketing director for lawyers it seemed so many of my individual conversations with them came back to this concept: they had forgotten how to play without self-destructing. Once they incorporated healthy play back into their personal lives, their lives blossomed.

Play has much competition. Student loan debt, mortgage, careers, families, the chatter voice that rehearses our to-do list, our community service–all these demand placement on the Google calendar. But it’s all a choice. Choose to give play a place there, too. It’s good for you.

Posted in health, healthy living, Inspiration | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments